Today is a new day.
I will focus on the positives. No matter how bad things may seem, there are good things to be found if you can only look. I may have lost my current position, but I do have somewhere else to work in the same company. Even though it’s a significant loss of pay, by staying here there are other opportunities available only to people who already work here. I have a home I enjoy. Apart from being bipolar, I have my health. No matter how bad I feel, I know there are others who love me and care what happens. Even my cat is a positive with the company and affection she gives me.
I will look for joy in the simple things. Enjoying that first cup of coffee out on the patio. Soaking up the sunshine when I go out to take my breaks. The smell of the grass that was cut this morning. Completing a task, no matter how small. Making it through another day.
I will appreciate my family and friends. Although my immediate circle of friends is very small, the friends I do have are deep and true, and they have stood by me through all my struggles. I’m blessed that I have so much love and support from my family. I will seek out time with them and cherish every moment. There are a lot of people who enjoy a huge social circle, but I’d rather have one good friend to 20 casual acquaintances. I’m very fortunate to have the relationships I do.
I will continue to work on my treatment plan. I have a new Dr. who is much more aggressive with the medicines and is working hard to find the cheapest alternatives to help with my finances. I have seen a marked improvement just over the last two days with the discontinuation of one of my mood stabilizers. I have more energy and my mood is actually improving. My Therapist is very accommodating and continues to see me even with my insurance problems. I’m very lucky that I found such an awesome therapist that has the style and technique that best fits my needs.
I’m going to accept my illness for what it is. Yes, it can be debilitating at times. It can drag me down into an absolute hell. It puts me into unsafe and out of control situations that are harmful and dangerous. This disease threatens my very life. But with acceptance comes understanding and with understanding comes healing. There may not be a cure, but there are ways to manage the worst of it and live a reasonably normal life. I just have to keep trying.
My writings have provided a huge source of love and support. Being able to organize my thoughts and express my feelings openly and honestly helps keep me grounded and always puts my situation into perspective. When I feel weak and alone I have scores of uplifting comments I can reread and remind myself that I’m not so alone after all. The tremendous outpouring of support has provided a very positive energy that is making a huge difference. I appreciate this more than I can ever express. My blog has been an amazing journey and has taught me so much about myself and others. I don’t know how I managed without it.
Yes, today is a new day. I am determined to make the most of it and live it the very best I can. I still have my struggles and I may or may not succeed today. But tomorrow is another new day, and another chance to tackle the demons and fight for my life.
Today is a day to survive.